A little bird

Sat, 19 Dec 2009 03:31:57 GMT

Grandma Evelyn passed away on Thursday. She was my first grandparent to pass. Her obituary reminds me of things we had in common. Puzzles, cats. Not listed: wine. She made homemade dill pickles that were to DIE for. She grew them in her garden and filled jars with crispy, fresh baby cucumbers, dill, garlic, and whatever else to produce individual jars of heaven. I have dreams about those pickles. In fact, I had a dream about her pickles the night before she died. With the last minute help of some completely amazing and thoughtful people, I will be able to drive down to Springfield for the visitation and funeral. Two or three of my co-workers pitched in to work for me on the weekend before the most popular holiday in the country, which is difficult to achieve as I'm the only charge nurse on my weekend. Val is going to take fabulous care of my animals, and Casey will be pleased to stay where he is comfortable. He will meet some new friends while watching the Packers play football, and he will probably take a car ride to Julia's house. It's just a huge weight off my shoulders that everybody has so quickly and easily pitched in to help me go down there.

Irresponsible driver is irresponsible.

Sat, 28 Nov 2009 15:42:38 GMT

Sun, 22 Nov 2009 21:12:57 GMT

It's been over a year and the emails keep coming. Four or five per day, straight to my spam folder. Hateful old racist fool.

Little Winston just went outside. He has tripled in size. He LOVES Casey.

CVDP is booming in what may be the best autumn ever. It's so harmonious. The weather couldn't be better and the dogs couldn't be happier. Casey's quality of life has improved since Val has started letting him out when I'm at work. I do the same for Libby during the day. Everybody wins.

I've accomplished two important things this week. I traded in my unfortunate Alero for a brand spanking new Accord, and I was honest with Emily about not going to the wedding. It's a couple of huge weights lifted, financially and emotionally. It's going to be a very conservative winter for me. Lots of dog walks and podcasts and not going out and spending money. Sounds perfect, actually. I have about 200 episodes of The Skeptics' Guide to the Universe waiting for me. And one energetic dog.

Sun, 15 Nov 2009 05:23:40 GMT

I have a new car. It smells like a new car. It's so much nicer than anything anyone should own. I needed to trade in the Alero while it still ran, and I work really hard and make my own money, so why not? It's a 2009 Honda Accord EX-L, loaded to the teeth, and I only drive about 5000 miles per year. Well, that could change.

Now I'm on a spending freeze.

Fri, 06 Nov 2009 19:31:48 GMT

alive from the first

Wed, 04 Nov 2009 05:16:03 GMT

I love ghosts. I love them so much. I wish they were real.

I went out tonight for the first time in a very long time. I just don't have the time or the money lately. What do I spend my time/money on? Casey. Wally. Spike. Tonight was very fun, though. I got to vent, I got to laugh, and I really liked the people I was out with. You know who you are.

I drove up to the north shore with Casey last week and we stayed a couple days at Bluefin. We went hiking, splashed around in the water, I got wet up to the top of my head, and sat in the jaccuzzi in my room and sipped wine and read books. It was a very relaxing time. Before that, my mom and Skipper met us in Duluth and we went to Glensheen, walked around the lake, walked, walked, walked, had dinner and margaritas, and had wine. It was a great time.

I was relaxed and happy on my way home until my car broke down. I blew a head gasket outside of a town called Barnum. A week and $1500 later (with the rental car and towing), I have my car back and it appears to be okay, but the mechanic warned me that I should trade it in soon. Gulp. I only have $65,000 miles on that car! He said that he can't guarantee the overheating that blew the head gasket won't have ruined other things in the car. I think he's being conservative... but he could have a point. I only put about five grand miles on that car a year, so it should be fine for awhie, but maybe I'll start thinking about trading it in while it still runs.

Casey got to ride in a tow truck. The company was really nice and drove me and Casey up to Cloquet, twenty miles north, to rent a car, and picked me up and drove me back today just because they're really nice. I might write a letter to the local newspaper about how nice they were to me, because I guess that's what they do in small towns.

Financially, it doesn't look good for me to go to the Bahamas in a couple of months. In fact, I'm pretty much screwed. Things just weren't falling into place for me as it was before the car thing. My dress isn't in. My passport hasn't been renewed. I don't want to be around some of the people who are going. Furthermore, there is more than one flower girl. It's not like I'm needed. Right? Also, spending time away from Casey just doesn't seem like a vacation to me. I know, I'm trying to justify not having a grand to fly there for a few days. I just don't have the money. It sucks, but damn. What can I do?

I love my co-op more than ever. It's so perfect for me and Casey. The location is perfect, the yard is perfect, most of the neighbors are perfect. Val, Winston's parents, Mark, Nadja, Emily... most of the people are great. I got so lucky three years ago. So lucky.

I brought Casey, Wally and Spike out to the 'burbs today to sit for a pet photo shoot. I hope something turned out. Spike didn't move much, and Casey posed very well, but Wally kept trying to sneak away. I'll find out how everything turned out tomorrow.

Thu, 22 Oct 2009 19:08:08 GMT

I don't think I've ever been this tired in my life, and I don't think Casey has ever been this bored. I hate being away from him this much. He spent a couple of days at daycare but my work schedule doesn't allow him to be there very much. I only have two shifts left of this huge work stretch, and then we're heading up north until Tuesday. I'm very excited.

I have the opportunity to take the H1N1 flumist vaccination today. I feel so rundown and borderline sick that I don't think I'll take it. It's live virus, so most likely I'll be sick during my mini vacation if I take it. I'll probably just wait for the shot to come out. I'll take it either way, because I have an obligation to my patients.

With flu season and H1N1 come the conspiracy theorists out of the woodwork like termites. These people anger me so much. A (small)pox on both their houses. Douchebags.

Alright, time for work.

Sat, 17 Oct 2009 22:22:35 GMT

Thursday: 10/15 1500-2330
Friday: 23-0730
Saturday: 19-0730
Sunday: 19-0730
Tuesday: 15-2330
Wednesday: 15-2330
Thursday: 15-2330
Friday 10/23: 15-2330 [note: 72 hours plus overtime in 9 days]
Saturday: 0800 Duluth
Sunday-Tuesday 10/27: Bluefin Bay
Wednesday: errands, cleaning
Thursday: 15-2330
Friday: 15-2330
Saturday 10/31: Rally with Skipper

Hint:

Let's not hang out.

Fri, 09 Oct 2009 21:30:17 GMT

Eye appointments are a laugh a minute.

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Thu, 08 Oct 2009 06:41:43 GMT

...said me to me. From 1 gb to 3 gb. Just now.

I have a lot on my mind, so I might vent later if I have time. It's mostly about this really shitty book series that contains a vile, controlling, abusive vampire as the main love interest. Battered women beware.

Egg babies

Fri, 02 Oct 2009 00:15:01 GMT

I UTO'd for an appointment I couldn't compromise on. EA yesterday. It's okay, I don't use a ton of vacation time. I took the opportunity to vet my cats and am going to a midnight showing of Capitalism: A Love Story . I won't learn anything I don't already know, but at least I can have popcorn.

I'm enjoying the weather. Rain is lovely, and the wind sounds like somebody blowing over a bottle at times. It's really relaxing. Cooler temps bring longer walks. This is great dog weather.

I'm absolutely addicted to audio books. I crank one out book per week between dog walking and cooking/cleaning. What a wonderful thing.

I bought this new toy, a turtle with egg babies, for Casey at the Ren Fest. Casey tears into every toy possible, even dismembers tennis balls, but he does okay with the egg babies under supervision. I put the egg babies and turtle up on the counter between plays so he doesn't ruin the egg babies. Today I noticed there was only one egg baby left on the counter. Lo and behold, I saw Wally carrying one around in his mouth. He brought it downstairs and added it to his stash of egg babies next to Spike's litter box. Later, I could hear him downstairs squeaking an egg baby. Casey wanted to join him, but I said, "No, leave Wally alone with the egg babies." I think it's adorable that Wally loves the egg babies. Egg babies.

I fell asleep on the couch after working a 12-hour night shift and woke up to some strange metallic sound. I opened my eyes and saw Wally dangling from the top of the railing above the stairs. Dangling! The metallic noise was his back claws against the rail. He fell all the way down, one story, to the bottom of the stairs before I could even get up. Spike never would've made it. Wally was okay. A&O x 4, VSS, CMS intact, neuros intact. WDL except for the fact that he was unable to answer my question: "WHAT THE FUCK?!" Maybe he'll stop with the tight rope walking that rail. Maybe.

Spike is always hungry. He is officially on a diet. I have to put up with him banging cupboards, biting me, meowing, and using his purr as a weapon for the rest of his life. Awesome.

Thu, 01 Oct 2009 01:00:53 GMT

I'm sure this is old news, but I saw this today for the first time ever while waking up from a nap. I want to see this. With Wally.

Sun, 13 Sep 2009 14:51:09 GMT

I never call. I never write.

Birthday was fun. I worked, and then went out with Calli, Amy and Jeff. A couple days later I celebrated with a small group of about eleven others. Tickles, then Vegas Lounge. Then Nye's for a drink. Perfect.

Co-op drama. Cityview consists of crabby old queens and only a few others. August was the first time I could see moving as a viable option. I've been here just shy of three years. I love it here, but I can't tolerate even the smallest bit of drama anymore. I'm willing to leave behind any sources of unpleasantness in my life without a moment's notice. It's not that bad, but it's the first time moving has been on my radar. Frequent impromptu wine picnics with Julia, Val, and all of our dogs have contented me for now.

Casey. He finished his fourth class. He's so smart! He's so good! What a wonderful dog. I'm so lucky. I will continue with the classes as long as we're both benefitting from them. It's such a positive, wonderful hobby for both of us.

I've been nipple deep in all this healthcare business. I'm still getting 3+ racist and horrible emails per day from my great uncle Erwin, straight to my spam folder. This brings me great pessimism. This country saddens me. It better not disappoint in the long run.

Activities. I've been trying to make it to the cabin whenever possible. Wine + dogs + fresh air. I went to the ABR for the fourth year in a row yesterday and didn't stay long. Beer is just so damn filling. I called it a day when I realized I was on my 8th glass of sprecher root beer. I'm just not the binge drinker I used to be. Today I'm going to the Ren Fest again for Dog Days, wine, and sheep. Next weekend, Duluth. We're going to drop Casey off at my mom's house because I can't find a decent dog/hotel situation. Casey loves his grandmama.

I like this.

Tue, 08 Sep 2009 19:31:41 GMT

Wed, 12 Aug 2009 02:10:54 GMT

What is it? Bitchy old queen week?

Fri, 07 Aug 2009 17:06:15 GMT

I had a dream this morning that I was dating Leonard from Big Bang Theory. I was meeting his mom, ice skating, drinking vanilla cherry diet dr pepper with him, deliriously happy.

Huh. I always thought I was more partial to Sheldon.

28 is great!

Fri, 07 Aug 2009 07:43:32 GMT

Don't be late

For our big date

Tickles is your fate.

Wed, 05 Aug 2009 07:11:00 GMT

My bones & joints are sore after my first birthday outing... a biking one.

It's cool. I work every day until my party, which isn't much.

What's the life expectancy of a box elder bug? I keep pointing one out, but none of my animals will eat it.

(there is pain that is trembling throughout my family, but I will not comment on it at this point)

How did I get so lucky?

Wed, 29 Jul 2009 08:12:51 GMT

You know what I want more than anything? I mean, besides a jewish mother-in-law? I want the rest of my week to be as pleasant and stress-free as today was.

In other news, the summer feels over.

Tue, 21 Jul 2009 23:40:22 GMT

I'm so unhappy right now.

And for what? Nothing's changed. She was a fucking cunt to me when we were kids. Why would she be any different as an adult?

I'm so jealous of people with functional siblings.

A mild drunk

Sun, 19 Jul 2009 06:39:11 GMT

I'm severely overthinking. Just some family stuff. I will get the most important opinion in the morning. Until then, my venting is limited to thumb pecking.

It's really cold. Just outside.

Movies I watched today:

Simon Birch
Bukkit List
Lassie (1994)
The Reader
Hotel for Dogs

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Wed, 08 Jul 2009 00:36:58 GMT

I'm blogging from urgent care because I'm tired of rolling things up. C-spine is okay. This better heal quickly because Chance us in town and I can't work like this.

Waiting for some drugs.

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Brewers

Thu, 25 Jun 2009 16:03:52 GMT

I hate white rabbits.

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Trip

Wed, 24 Jun 2009 21:52:22 GMT

It's relaxing, I'm tired, and it might be time for another nap soon. I'm excited for the game, the party, the other party, and then to see my animals. I miss Casey most of all.

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Sat, 13 Jun 2009 20:51:12 GMT

Casey is at daycare this weekend. He's been there for seven hours and is still zooming and darting around. He's the prettiest dog in his room. I just love his tail light.

I leave for vacation way too soon, but first I must work two eights and four twelves in six days. I must get out at least part of this. On Friday after work I will have a new phone, and as exciting at that is for me after 2.5 years, I must also make time for therapy, dropping Casey off at his grand-ma-ma's, packing, lining up some cat-sitters, and going to bed early. Does anybody want to join Audrey in the awesome task of playing my wii while I'm gone while Spike touches your face a couple times that week?

This weekend needs to be uneventful. My heart can't take a repeat of my last work weekend.

I'm bored with my life so I've been thinking about getting another tattoo. Something train-like or something to memorialize Jacques.